Now that I’m divorced, I have found myself back into the dating scene. Last month, I received a message on facebook from a very handsome guy. It read, “always had a crush on you”. No, “hello, how are you?” Just that he had a crush on me. I figured that started from my college days. I looked at his profile and realized that we were both alumni of the same school and both members of BGLOs (Black Greek Letter Organizations), Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc and Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity, Inc., respectively.
I simply responded that I didn’t know he had a crush on me and we had a short, but good conversation. He asked me to dinner, which I thought was nice. Recent experiences had me thinking most men just wanted me to tell them when I could meet them for a drink, or come to their homes, which I politely decline. They must really think THOT is written on my forehead. So being asked to an actual dinner date was a nice change from the norm.
I was actually excited. It would be my first date with someone Ive never gone out with before. I have been on a couple of dates, but they were with men I’ve known for a while. We exchanged numbers and decided to play it by ear because we were both busy for the next couple of weekends. The next morning, I got the typical “good morning, beautiful” text. I replied with a good morning. I figured we’d text later on in the day, but that is not what happened. He texted me ALL day. There were all kinds of questions.
Why am I getting divorced?
Did I do everything I could to save it?
Did I have sex enough?
Would I call myself a plain Jane romantic or a freak?
Can he come to my classroom in basketball shorts and no underwear and sit in front with his legs open?
I did a MAJOR eye roll. Of course, he was flirting with that last question, but I didn’t find it remotely sexy or interesting. We hadn’t even met face to face and he’d just gotten my number the night before. What kind of woman does he think I am? If he was trying to determine if I was sexually active, all he had to do was ask. And what kind of man would ask me, a teacher, if he could sit in my classroom full of children, with no underwear in basketball shorts? This fool is crazy, and not even the fun kind.
The phone calls and texts kept coming over the next couple of weeks. In that time, I learned a lot about ole Pretty Boy. He’s in his late 30s. Has a son, doesn’t get along with the mother, works retail and is trying to get his life together. He knows he can cook better than me. He wants to fall in love one day but is concerned that I’m taking a break from relationships because he’s interested in me (I guess he’s used to getting what he wants and didn’t want to risk getting to know me without the guarantee that I’d be his girlfriend). He’s also a freak, but is working on being more romantic. He invited me to go away with him for his birthday weekend to get “white girl wasted”, whatever that means, but I said no.
Now, why did I continue to converse with him? Honestly, I enjoyed laughing at him. However, funny things must come to an end. He tried to check me one night for not texting or calling him all day. I got a few butt hurt messages from him too. He actually asked me if something was wrong with my fingers or my phone. I decided to ask him what was he expecting. When he said “nothing”, I said “Great, then we’re on the same page! Have a good night.” I haven’t heard from his since. We never even made it to dinner.
Basically, the Pretty Boy is just pretty. He seems rather vapid to me. There were always a ton of grammatical errors in his texts. I had to read them at least three times to make sense of some of them. Dating him would have been a complete waste of time. My ex husband did enough of that, so I’m not eager to allow anyone else to waste more of it. I do hope Pretty Boy gets his life together though. He said he wants to fall in love. I truly hope he does fall in love and finds happiness with someone who can love and appreciate what he brings to the table. I just know that woman isn’t me.
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Pretty. Petty. Parent. 